Not a relationship per se—this business of being on my own and caring only for myself is intriguing and I’m learning too much to want to abandon it.
I wasn’t interested in Match.com, nor a friends-with-benefits setup. Or so I thought until I went on the one and only date I’ve had (outside that marriage) in the last quarter century.
We spent three hours chatting, making connections, occasionally flirting, a bit of hand-holding. I found him attractive and decided he was someone I wanted to know better. He needed to get home, he said, suddenly slammed with exhaustion.
Rule #1: When I feel the impulse do something for “him” (whomever he might be), I will look at my own life and ask if that nurturing thing is something I need to do for myself.
I have no confidence whatsoever that this tactic will work, but I hope to try.
A day and a half after our dinner, he sent another smiley face via email. I wanted to reach through the screen and grab him by the throat: Explain yourself!
A few hours later he posted on his Facebook page that he’d come down with the flu the night of our date.